Thursday, 16 June 2011

Is he Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde?

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June of 14 was a great time of self-exploration for me. Just graduating from high school and moving out on my own was exciting. Life was great…there were no rules, could come and go as I pleased, and there were numerous parties for me to attend.

That is when I meet Mike. He was a sophomore in College and he was absolutely charming. We started to talk and realized we shared a lot of the same interests. A month later we would start a great relationship or what I thought would be a great relationship.

Mike would visit me every day and any time there was a party we were there. We always had fun together and neither of us seemed to get to out of hand with our drinking. Months passed by and the parties and the drinking really got tiresome, but to Mike it was as though he was a child eating candy for the first time, he never got enough. What started out as harmless fun turned into a nightmare. Alcohol had become Mike’s weakness.

Any free moment that Mike had he was intoxicated. Speaking to him about his problem only made him angry with me. When he was intoxicated he seemed to have a Jekyll and Hyde personality and I was afraid to be around him.

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It took some time before his family members became aware of his disease and we tried everything possible to get him the help he needed but he would not hear of it. He was convinced that he was not an alcoholic.

Blaming myself was an everyday occurrence and the compelling feeling that no matter what I had to save him. There were countless fights between us due to the alcohol but that didn’t stop me from following him wherever he went trying to keep him away from his only love. There was nothing I wouldn’t have done for him trying to keep him from getting arrested for public intoxication, driving while intoxicated, fights, and harassment.

The time came when I couldn’t take it anymore and tried to end the relationship to no avail. Mike began to come to my house every night after his drinking binges and when I would not answer the door he would start to bang on the doors and holler my name, begging me to help him or to let him in my home. Sympathy would soon fulfill me and in minutes he would be sitting in my living room. At times he would be really sweet but the majority of the time he was a monster.

It had finally happened one night the one thing that I vowed would never ever happen to me…Mike got angry with me and beat me up. That was the night that I threw him out and told him that it was over and he left willingly with the intentions of coming back to my house begging for my forgiveness and when I would not forgive him he broke every window in the house. The memory of being petrified and hiding in the closet still haunts me to this day.

There had to be something I could do to get out of this relationship and get away from him. In the end a restraining order was my only hope. The trip to the police station was very helpful. I received the restraining order and was so relieved to know that I would be protected.

Mike only came around once after the order was issued and it was to apologize and to tell me he was going to get some help. I have not seen him since and a part of me is grateful for that.

Some people my age and younger have not dealt with any thing of this nature. They think drinking is ok as long as it is in moderation but that is how it started for Mike and it got out of control. A very valuable lesson was taught to me…drinking is not a habit that I want to have to break.

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